new semester

With both of the girls being in school this semester I've decided to take a full course loan. 13 credit hours thus far. I just started class on the 5th and I'm already feeling a bit bogged down. Who knew. I've had a hard time letting go of Tori this year, even though she is only in half day Pre-K. I was sad to see her walk down the hall with her new found friends. Once again that feeling of not being needed crept into my mind. I walked back home crying with Michael by my side. He always laughs when I get emotional about the girls. His thought is that he is proud of them for starting a new journey in their lives. My thought is that they will no longer need me. However, I know that is the farthest thing from the truth. I realized this when one of our cats pooped on their rug in their bathroom. Both refused to clean the mess up. Rats!!!! Or when all of a sudden they are too tired to help clean their room. "Too bad for you!" I tell them. Better luck next time. OR when I hear the sisterly love coming from the back yard. "Stop touching me." "I'm not your friend." "Get out of my space." "I'm telling." "Mom, Abby said stupid." "Tori, shhhhhh don't tell." It's in those sweet loving moments I know that no teacher will ever replace me. It's in those moments that I would like to be replaced. Then I come down out of the clouds and yell for the girls to come in and clean up for dinner. My life is hectic and overwhelming and school for everyone is GREAT!